WHENEVER I PUT IN HIGH HOPES AND EFFORT IN SOMETHING I DO, OFTEN THEY LEAD TO MAJOR DISAPPOINTMENT AND HEARTACHE.
I admitted that the effort I put in was last minute but worthwhile. The outcome of O Levels was much pleasant compared to Prelims. Who in the world gets 50 points of their prelim L1R5 ? Who ? ME ! Fucking ME !
Well, that 50 points really brought me back to reality. I would have nowhere to go if 50 was my O level results. The headache, heartaches, lack of sleep, high fever, medical treatment was what I went through during the tough times of O Level. I was very thankful to see 17 as my L1R4 and 20 as my ELR2B2 in my Form A. I was definitely eligible for poly admission. But with 17 and 20, where can go ? None of my listed courses that suits my interest. I am on my own now. I have nowhere to go. Business courses had outcasted me for sure. Nursing? ZERO interest. Humanities, outcasted as well. I am left with the variety of engineering courses among the 5 polytechnics.
ELECTRICAL AND ELECTRONIC ENGINEERING ??
Do I look like I have the engineering interest ? WAHLAUWEYY! I got my 7th choice. What the heck is MOE doing ? MOE sleeping in 2011 is it ? I couldn't do much. There's a saying "You'll never know unless you try." Let me get this straight, "How are you gonna survive 3 years doing something you don't like ? How ?"
Build up the interest ? How long will that take ? It's similar to my secondary school science subject. I never liked physics in my entire life. Proven, after 2 years of physics, I didn't do well. I don't want history to ever repeat itself. Repeating the same year in poly is as good as wasting time. Might as well, I waste my time now.
ITE, MY LAST RESORT.
ITE isn't that bad either. Besides, Higher NITEC certificates are well-recognised everywhere. I don't mind going to ITE to continue my education at a slower and steady pace rather than failing my modules like no one cares. Many people don't encourage me to go to ITE. Reason being, the bad influence is in the air and it's very strong. I understood their intention. I knew their intention wasn't a bad one. But if that is what it takes for me to succeed, I am willing. I am willing to step out of my house the first thing tomorrow morning, drag my mum along with me to ITE College West and appeal for business studies or College Central and appeal for Visual Merchandising. This time, I won't turn back. I'll stick to my this decision. ITE ; my last resort. The start of success. ♥
I WON'T TURN BACK.
I am not putting the blame on MOE for this. I shall blame myself. Blame myself for not putting in enough effort. Thank you all, for everything you've shared with me throughout my life before monster O Levels came.
Labels: `♥ I won't turn back.
